Pronouns, what they are and why they matter
Pronouns, are sometimes referred to as PGP or Preferred Gender Pronouns, although the community uses simply Pronouns, or Personal Pronouns. Tip #1 - “Preferred” should not be used.
What is a pronoun – Back to English grammar we go! A pronoun is a word we use in place of a proper noun, like someone’s name. For example, “Have you seen what Mary posted online today, she is so funny.” She is the pronoun. Now that we got the grammar out of the way, let’s talk about why pronouns matter.
In English, our most commonly used pronouns (he/she) specifically refer to a person’s gender. For queer, gender non-conforming, non-binary, and transgender people, these pronouns may not fit, can create discomfort, and can cause stress and anxiety.
A recent study showed that in transgender youth, using correct pronouns and names reduces depression and suicide risks.
Having trouble understanding why this would upset someone? Think about your pronoun (it’s probably “he” or “she”). Now imagine someone calling you the one you don’t think of yourself as. Imagine them doing it over and over and over, even after you’ve corrected them. Here’s a video that helps explain it further.
Normalize the use of pronouns; when you introduce yourself, include your pronouns. Hi, I’m Ciara, my pronouns are she/her. When you do this it’s an invitation for others to do the same, lets people know how you want to be addressed, and helps normalize the conversation around gender identity.
What if I make a mistake?
It happens, we all make mistakes! Apologize, do better, and move on quickly. If you make a mistake in front of a group of people, you may want to apologize to the person in private later on – no need to make a scene or draw a lot of attention. No one likes that! The best thing to do is to use the correct pronoun the next time.
I see pronouns in people’s email signatures, why is that?
Including pronouns in your email signature and social media profiles is important for inclusivity. It normalizes discussions about gender. It is a way of showing respect and support for the LGBTQ+ community, especially trans and gender non-conforming people. It lets people know how you want to be addressed, taking the guesswork out of it.
Again, the most important thing is to be inclusive, respectful, and identify others in the way they ask of you.
*Some of the content here is from https://lgbtlifecenter.org/pronouns/